Parents: what have you been doing with your life
Me: well by daytime I smoke crack & get freaky on webcam for some rich foreign boys
By night I’m secretly hired on as a stripper at an old folks home, as I casually give blowjobs to dying veterans with the last of their life savings
This ass is crackalackin for the dough tho
Why can’t everyone just love their self and be happy with who they are and everything they have and everyone around them. I get that things can be rough and sometimes shit sucks but come on, you won the sperm race. Be proud. Embrace that shit.